The Dumps

Depression.

That was the diagnosis handed down to me by the fellow in the Department of Family Medicine on a random Monday afternoon.

I've long thought that mental health was an illness, a disease. Something that you couldn't rub some dirt on or suck it up. You needed to be appropriately treated, just as you would the flu or some virus.

But the thing is....

I never thought it would happen to me.

It's been an odd time since I was given that diagnosis. I've been placed on some medication and I've spoken with a counselor. I think I'm doing better. I think.

In the meantime, I'll keep improving. I'll get better and slowly find my way back into the light. Back to my happiness.

But I won't be ashamed. 1 in 5 adults will experience some type of depression this year.

That's a big number. That means there are a lot of us dealing with this illness. And it is nothing to be ashamed of.

So today, I'm sharing my story. And I'm going to continue to get better. And eventually, I'll hopefully be feeling like myself again.

But in the meantime, I'm going to give myself a little TLC and do what it takes to be healthy again.

Veterans Day

Happy Veterans Day and thank you to all who have served. I'm proud to be a family member of those who have served our country and allow us the freedoms and liberties we have today. 

God Bless America

xo,

j

October Book Review

So it turns out mixing a full-time job, a social life, a puppy, and sleep makes for little free time to sit around and read books!

That said, I've still managed to fit a couple into the month of October!

So I'm happy to share my three reads from this month!

I mentioned this book a few weeks ago and was finally able to finish it! I really liked it! It started to drag a bit toward the middle/end, but it wrapped up well! It was an ending I wasn't really expecting and was actually quite sad. But I liked the suspense of the book and how the numerous characters tied together. But a word of warning, it is about a plane crash so it definitely isn't a book to pick up if you're looking for a fun, light read. 

Who We Were Before follows a family in present and past tense. It tangles the history of a couple, and how things went wrong, with their current struggles. This book tugged at the heartstrings a bit, as you feel for this couple and what they are going through. I found myself rooting for them and hoping they could work it out. The epilogue of this one tied things together, but I still found myself wanting more of an explanation or closure from this one!

I think the theme of my October books was sad and dreary, because Evelyn, After didn't get much better. This story follows two couples, intertwined by an affair and the scandalous aftermath. I found myself quite sad reading this one, as I wanted so much more for each character. It really left me unsatisfied, so here's hoping November's books get better!

If you have any good picks I should read, let me know!

xo,

j

Decisions, decisions

So when I graduated from the University of Iowa MHA program in May, I immediately began my administrative fellowship with the University of Iowa Physician group here in Iowa City. It's hard to believe I've already been here for 6 months!

But recently, my boss has begun asking me what I'd like to do once my fellowship ends.

My answer: Who the hell knows?!

And it got me thinking about the bigger question in life: how do we ever know what we want to do? Sure I decided I wanted to do healthcare administration. But even then, there are a MILLION routes and choices I could take. I could be a physician recruiter, I could work with IT, I could be a finance guru, I could work on strategic planning, I could do so many different things.

So how do you choose? How do you choose a job, a city, a house, and more?!

For me, I'm starting to figure out what I like and more importantly, what I don't like. So I know that IT and finance aren't the routes for me. So I'll keep trying new things. And eventually, I'll figure out what it is I want to do and I'll begin applying for those jobs.

But through all of this, I've realized the most important thing I can do is to be happy. So I'll keep looking until I find something that I love. And I'll apply that to every aspect of my life, not just my career. I'll live in a place I love and surround myself with people I love.

And I will do my best to make sure that I am as happy as I can be every damn day:)

So even though my route there may be a little unconventional, I'll figure it out. And I'll be sure to love every moment of the process.

I hope you find your happiness too.

xo,

j

Life Lately

Some days, life hits you like a ton of bricks. And other days, it's all sunshine and roses. Well life lately has been a perfect mix of both:)

I've been doing dates with my cousin's little kiddos. For the older munchkin's date, we headed to get our nails done. This time, the little munchkin and I went to the Children's Museum in Iowa City. If you haven't been there yet, it's a must! We had so much fun!

She was all about the grocery shopping and showing me what she picked!

They have different 'stations' and she loved the hospital. I just couldn't stop laughing at her with the walker!

But I think her favorite place might have been the music room! So much fun to run around and make all the noise she wanted!

Later that week I got to go pick the kiddos up from daycare!

Before heading to the park, we sat on the ground and watched the train go by! We even worked on our numbers by counting the cars that went by! It was a pretty long train and we stopped after 30:)

In the midst of all that fun, I threw in a wine night with Hocus Pocus and some of my favorite co-workers!

You can clearly note that is my dog by her interest in the wine:) Like owner, like puppy... (the saying is still applicable...right?! Ha!)

Halloween weekend I headed up to Milwaukee to visit Lindsey! I met Lindsey in grad school and after we graduated, she headed to Milwaukee for her fellowship and I stayed in Iowa City for mine! So this was my first trip to visit her and we had a blast! We also think we won best costume:)

For Halloween night, I went out to trick or treat with the munchkins!

We went as a patient, an elephant, and a doctor! They are at a perfect age to experience the magic of Halloween and it is so fun to be a part of watching their joy!

I mean how cute are they?!

And speaking of cute....

A friend of mine just had a baby and I got to go steal some baby cuddles! He was so precious and I love getting to hold him and catch up with his Mama!

And finally,

Tuesday of last week I headed up to Dubuque for work! I was able to sneak away for lunch and took my sandwich over to Fenelon Place Elevator for an awesome view of Downtown Dubuque and the river. It was a perfect place for lunch:)

So that is the past couple weeks condensed into one big post!

Happy Monday everyone!

xo,

j